Where Service and Competence Collide » Self Help

How Can I Save Our Relationship?

admin — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 14:58:42 +0000

I’m sorry. If you’re reading this you must be having a very rough time in your relationship. I know how difficult that can be. If you are asking, ‘How can I save our relationship?” I do have some tips that might be able to make a difference for you and your partner.

There are a few things you have to consider very carefully and honestly first. You have to decide why you want to save your relationship. That might sound like a dumb comment to make but sometimes we cling to things that we should just let go. We cling for the wrong reasons such as fear of being alone. Before you invest too much time and emotion in trying to save your relationship first make sure that it should be saved.

Now that you’ve done your honest soul searching and you’ve decided that your relationship is worth saving here are a few tips you can follow which should help:

1) It’s not all about you. So often in relationships one person tends to carry more of the burden. They are the ‘fixer’. They are the ones who carry most of the emotional baggage. If that person is you than you have to realize that you can’t do it all. If your relationship is going to be saved your partner has to be able, and willing, to meet you halfway.

2) Try to communicate without condemning or criticizing. When a relationship starts to falter there are a lot of hurt feelings and frustrations from both parties. These hurts can build up into a huge wall of resentment. That wall is very tough to tear down. It will take a lot of time, patience, and open communication.

If the two of you aren’t good at communicating you might need to find resources such as a book or counseling, that can help you work on your communication skills.

3) Own it. If you’ve screwed up you need to be a mature adult and admit your mistake and apologize for it. This is key. Remember in step 2 when I talked about resentments building up? You can do a lot to ease those resentments if you just own up to your mistakes and offer a sincere apology for the hurt you may have caused. To someone who loves you and wants to make things work this will be a very sweet sound.

Follow these 3 steps and you will be well on your way to answering the question ” how can i save our relationship?”. Remember, the problems didn’t spring up overnight and they’re not going to go away overnight either. But if the two of you are willing to work together you can get back the loving, fulfilling relationship you both want.

Advice On How To Get Your Ex Back

Is Saving A Relationship Worth It

admin — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 23:27:41 +0000

Every relationship goes through struggles but after you have been fighting for a long time to keep it alive you may ask if saving a relationship like this really worth it. You may have gone to marriage counseling and sought ways to bring back the love. You will have worked only to find that you would again start having intimacy problems of some kind. You may have experienced struggles in your dating life. You ask around for dating tips or advice and have been given some good suggestions only to find that the troubles are still there.

The struggles continue but there are some things you should think about to see if saving a relationship like the one you are in is worth the challenge. If you are thinking about getting a divorce or separating, you need to look at these things honestly and maybe get some serious relationship advice. Saving a relationship is an important thing to try and accomplish and will take a lot of work. It can also be frustrating work if the relationships not really there.

Write a list of the people you most enjoy spending time with. Is your spouse or partner on that list? Do you really enjoy spending time together? When was the last time you went out and just had fun? Is it possible for the two of you to do that? Are you content just being with them? A good relationship between two people is going to be one where they can enjoy being together or can feel content just having the person there.

Another very important thing to consider when you are deciding if this relationship is worth saving is do they make you feel like you are understood. Do you listen to your spouse? Do you feel like you are being listened to and that they understand you? Spend some time and try to see if they do.

A relationship is supposed to be a place where you can go when you need comforted. Is the relationship one that makes you feel comfort when you have gone through something bad? Is the relationship something that you constantly need comforted about? If you are looking elsewhere for comfort, there may be a problem.

If there are questions about faithfulness or infidelity, they need to be addressed. Are you able to trust them? Are they able to trust you? If you have a problem answering either one of those questions affirmatively, then you may either need some serious marriage counseling or couple’s therapy.

In saving a relationship, there are many other things to consider and a decision like this should not be taken lightly. Ask hard questions and search hard for answers and then you may be able to find if saving a relationship like the one you are in is worth it.

Healing A Broken Heart

New Relaxation Technique To Stop Panic Attacks #1

admin — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 13:05:36 +0000

If you’re currently doing everything you can think of to try to stop panic attacks, then there’s a good chance you’ve tried some form of relaxation technique. This might include things like yoga, breathing techniques, or maybe even some forms of gentle exercise.
But there’s another form of relaxation technique that many people overlook, especially people with anxiety disorders. The relaxation technique I’m talking about is mindfulness meditation.
In case mindfulness meditation is new to you, let me quickly tell you what it is and why it could help you if your anxiety is causing you problems.
Mindfulness meditation is a combination of controlled breathing and increased awareness of one’s self: increased awareness applies to your body, your thoughts, and your breathing.

tips for panic attacks

Where Should We Focus

admin — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 20:46:06 +0000

Where should we concentrate – on changing attitudes or changing actions?

“When morals are sufficient, laws are unnecessary, when morals are insufficient, laws are unenforceable.”
Emile Durkheim

This quote by Emile Durkheim expresses my sentiments exactly. Behavior that in any way reasonably demoralizes and dehumanizes another is wrong. Physical violence against another for no other reason than their sexual orientation is wrong. We must attack the problem behaviors whole heartedly however I am of the opinion that when we deal with the actions we are only touch the manifestation of a seed of thought. If you have lived any length of time you will recognize this as being true.

Northern Tools

No More Anger

admin — Wed, 07 Apr 2010 18:15:52 +0000

Do you tend to feel anger every day? Do you wonder why you are mad all the time? Communication can be dramatically diminished when one person is angry. It is good to feel anger, because without anger we wouldn’t appreciate happiness. There are some great ways to avoid the escalation of anger. There is hope! You can see a licensed professional. Counselor Jacey Tramutt, MA, LPC from Golden, Colorado specializes in working with people who suffers from anger. Everyone deserves to be happy! You have to find it inside yourself. Make that crucial call to get on your way to a more fulfilling life.

Making it Work

admin — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 23:14:10 +0000

Did you marry your best friend? Are they still your best friend? Life can put a real strain on a marriage. The main thing we need to remember is to not let anything come between our relationships. I know of an excellent therapist that specializes in marriage. Counseling is an excellent way to lay a solid foundation for a marriage. Jacey Tramutt, MA, LPC from Golden, Colorado specializes in working with couples that are ready and willing to make lasting changes in their marriage. Why try and figure out how to help your marriage by yourselves. With Jacey Tamutt MA, LPC, you will get your monies worth, I promise!

Don’t Get Revenge, Get Your Ex Back

admin — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 16:20:41 +0000

You can’t believe you’ve been dumped by the one you thought was THE one. Try not to plot revenge – instead, think what might return them to your embrace. The breakup might have been nasty in the heat of the moment, but that doesn’t really matter. It also doesn’t mean the end even if your ex-partner is dating others now. What matters is that you know what it takes to change the game and get your ex back.One of the most painful experiences that can happen to anyone is being dumped by someone you loved and trusted. For some people, it can take a very long time to process and move on, and many people are never able to do this. However, if your love for your ex is deep and true, you can be assured there is still hope for renewing and rebuilding your lost relationship. You might even make it better than before if you know what was missing and needs attention. Many people have been able to do this.Because others have accomplished this, you can have hope in this situation. You just need to be aware of what needs fixing, what will and won’t work. You don’t want to make the mistake of getting your ex back only to find out it wasn’t what you really wanted in the first place. Practice self-honesty and be willing to let go as well. For insight and comfort you can visit Broken Heart Quotes.

Stop Having Low Self-Esteem

admin — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 02:23:00 +0000

Did you know that you are not alone when it comes to having low self-esteem? Many people have been pushed over, knocked down and beat up when it comes to establishing their place in this world. Well there is good news! You don’t have to live that way any longer! Fortunately we can choose counseling. Golden Colorado therapist Jacey Tramutt, MA, LPC, has the tools and skills you need to cultivate your confidence. Sometimes, all we need is someone to talk to, and someone to listen. Help is out there, all you have to do is make the call! You don’t have to do it all on your own.

Game On: How To Get Your Ex Back – Part 3

admin — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 22:49:17 +0000

Why even bother playing if you you don’t believe that you can win ex back? You have to have confidence in not only your ability to do this but you have to believe that you deserve this. Believe in yourself and you will soon find out how to win your ex back.

Getting back with your ex is a huge challenge but it is something that you can do. Just make sure that you treat this as the important thing that it is. If you learn how to take it seriously and really play to win the game then you may have just found out how to win ex back.

More relationship tips at getmyexboyfriendback.net.

Game On: How To Get Your Ex Back – Part 2

admin — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 22:49:13 +0000

Is getting back with your ex really important to you? How much thought have you put into this? How much time have you spent looking at yourself and trying to improve areas that may have caused problems? The truth is, you will never know how to win back ex unless you decide that it is the top priority in your life. Treat it as the most important thing in your life and chances are you will have a greater chance of success.

When you are seeking relationship advice and are asking, “how to win back ex” the advice you get won’t matter unless you believe that this is something you can do. If you want that romance to return, you have to believe that you can do it.

Learn how to get an ex back.